This guide is for all Unmarried Americans working abroad for less than ~$95,100 / year.
You have two options:
The Old, Shitty Way: Download form 1040 and 2555EZ, fill them out on your computer and finish by hand, then send them to:
Department of the TreasuryInternal Revenue Service CenterAustin, TX 73301-0215USA
Fast Way: Use H&R's Free File program which automates 90% of the process by asking you simple questions.
Image of this shitty restaurant shamelessly stolen from A Fat Girl's Food Guide to Eating in Korea
Kervan is a second story Turkish restaurant in Itaewon conveniently located off-a Exit 4, next to the shit across the street from the who gives a fuck. The meat is dry. The prices are outrageous. The rice pudding sucks.The décor is nice, but the prices are outrageous. The only redeeming quality about Kervan is the one non-Korean waitress: Not only was she competent enough to take orders and serve food at a Western level of decency and competence, the ass was fat.
Really it was my fault- High prices are sometimes a reasonable heuristic to assume high quality, but the ratio of Korean to Western customers was a blaring “Get the fuck out of here” alarm. In any other country, you look for restaurants frequented by locals in order to avoid tourist traps and eat good food. In Korea, the opposite is true.
I used to think this was some racist bullshit observation perpetuated by the whiny expat circlejerk, but I’ve been burned enough times to know better now. Koreans have vastly different tastes than the rest of the world. Yes, people in India prefer different flavors to people in Spain, this is true of all countries, but not nearly to the extent it is true in Korea. I used to think Chinese people liked weird stuff, particularly the ma2 la4 numbing spice popular in Henan and Szechuan provinces, but the Korean palate makes that look normal.
“Please sir, may I have some whore?”
I briefly mentioned prostitution in my neighborhood review of Deokcheon. After a lot of research, I've mapped out pretty much most of the popular prostitution spots in Busan. I hope this information will come in handy for someone
Before I continue, two important things:
Most prostitutes will not risk their health with your dirty AIDS dick for any amount of money. Korea's HIV rate is extremely low compared to the HIV rate in the United States, so what I'm sayin' is don't hate the player, hate the game.. Put yourself in the prostitute's shoes: If your anal/ vaginal health isn't more important than being politically correct, you're a moron. In any case, if you do get rejected by a whore because you're a foreigner, maybe you'll understand how hurtful racial profiling can be after having a nice personal encounter as a victim of it. Not getting my hopes up, but hey, it wouldn't be the first positive thing to come out of racism.
Apparently MBC did a news report that included a screenshot and quote from this site. Something about how I don't like teaching 4th and 5th graders that smell bad. Seriously? This country's on the brink of war with a nuclear power and they can't reign in the Native English teacher hate. Korean teachers are notoriously unfireable, which results in thousands of awful, awful teachers tenured for life, protected under the wing of the Ministry of Education.
Read more about it here.
The title of their report was
"Unqualified instructors abound... unbelievable English native speaking instructors"
Is it really that hard to believe that the world doesn't want to eat cuisine that relies so heavily on fermented vegetables and soybeans and red chili paste? Food journalists have circled the globe thirty times over documenting the cuisines of different cultures for years, it's not like Korean food is some hidden secret waiting to be discovered like Burmese food. It's not that it's too spicy either; I could wash my balls with the spiciest maeuntang (a soup made from fish scraps) and it wouldn't even give me wood. Most people just don't like it. Most people don't like Finnish food either. Sweden, Norway, Ireland, Scotland and Germany are some other countries whose cuisines have not had much influence on the rest of the world. They're over it.
But not Korea. The inferiority complex over their food stinks so heavily of small penis syndrome that it almost gives me respite from such classic Korean flavors as
It's 8 months into my contract which means the talk of renewing has started. Someone will email the ministry of education and if they're lucky, get a date of when the deadline for renewal applications is. Usually, like most important events in Korea we aren't given much notice. Our coteacher might hand us the form a day before the deadline, themselves receiving it on the day as well. The application itself isn't much. Just a sheet of paper indicating whether or not you'd like to change schools or address. Annoyingly, it is pretty much binding no matter what happens during the last four months of your contract.
When I found out that the Daegu office was calling for applications by next week, I found myself thinking about what my decision would be every hour of the day. By Tuesday, I was 80% sure I'd renew. A friend was bequeathing me her motorcycle, and another would be moving closer to me. Other reasons for staying would be a nice $200/month raise and a better apartment. But by the strongest argument for renewing my contract would always be the job itself: Easy work with chill supervisors, tons of free time and holidays. That's a great deal compared to much of what I see back home. Namely, unemployment. As I thought about this, and all the perks of living in the country, and of all the money I saved this year, I imagined how a third year would feel.
More than a few times I've said that I feel like I'm already semi-retired at this job. I'd say this like it was a good thing, even as a boast. But now, “comfortable” doesn't sound the same way. After two years of it, comfort doesn't describe what you're in pursuit of anymore. What you're really experiencing is complacency. Life isn't about taking the easy route and patting yourself on the back. Not if you're 23. There are no charms left to this country if there ever were to begin with. I don't know what I'm going to do next, I just know I have to get out. Hell, just look at the past 6 months of posts on this blog. Barely anything at all.
By Friday I was weighing all the cons of staying another year. I'd start paying taxes. In all likely hood, my string of good luck as far as dating would run out. And I would have to subject myself to Korean cuisine for an entire year. But all of these objections became moot once I realized what it actually was that was calling me to stay: Fear. Fear of going back to the real world. Fear of being told I wasn't the most qualified candidate for the position. Most of all, fear of the unknown.
Good luck getting this job without a STEM or a Master's degree.
Jimjilbangs are my new favorite thing about Korea. This is because I
Frequently travel far from my apartment to find people to fuck
Infrequently succeed in this endeavor, which leaves me with nowhere to sleep
Don't like paying 30k to stay at a shitty love motel.
Before I came to Korea, I was in an abusive relationship that I needed to get the fuck away from and that helped me take the clunge. But, I certainly still had my fears about moving to Korea to teach English. I had two in particular that are shared by just about everybody, and tend not to get talked about. The emotional hurdles like moving half a world away from everyone you know, and living as an outsider who can't speak the language get discussed much more. But to me, those weren't nearly as hard to get over.
The first reservation, assuming you don't want to teach English for the rest of your life is delaying your career and depreciating your degree. You can explain a year teaching English to an interviewer. They understand the tough job market and will respect that you had a full time job. But two years? You'll still be ahead of the jobless bums smoking weed in their parents basement, but well behind the second-tier graduates who landed an unpaid internship or went on to finish a Master's degree. And after those guys, there aren't many spots left. Don't fool yourself- whatever your skill set is, it'll be heavily depreciated after even a year of disuse. Who you know is more important for getting your foot in the door, but forgetting half of what you know- it's not gonna help get the other one in the building.
I'll be unemployable by the time I'm done here. Obviously this job doesn't provide relevant work experience. Worse, it doesn't even teach you relevant skills to do anything but babysit, let alone marketable ones you can put down on a resume. And now I'm too ripe for a paid internship, too spoiled for an unpaid one.
Move aside, alcoholism, suicide, and Gangnam Style, a new Korean fad is here: Going to other countries and having sex with children and hookers.
"Koreans rank among the top clients of prostitutes in Southeast Asia, ahead even of Japanese and Chinese travelers, extensive research suggests. The conclusion comes from research by the Korean Institute of Criminology that included field surveys in Vietnam, Thailand, Cambodia and the Philippines, study of UN reports and other relevant documents, interviews with local social workers and neighbors, and arrest records at local police stations. "