I live in what's generally known to be one of the rainiest places in Sweden. This summer, however, has been mostly sunny. Only a few days of rain, and even during those days it didn't really rain a lot.
But it seems today that Mother Nature decided to release all that rain all at once, during the exact 60-or-so-minute block when we were out walking the dogs.
You know it's raining a lot when you can feel tiny rivers flowing down behind your ears.
And none of us were dressed for the occasion, since it wasn't raining when we left the house. Can you spell "soaked?"
As far as weather goes, it doesn't get much more miserable. (Except the February winter which makes you positively prefer death over continued existence.)
Anyway, earlier this morning I was reading "The Motivation Hacker" by Nick Winter. In it, he talks about how he will track his happiness during random points during the day. He thought he wanted to move to California for the weather, but when he measured his actual happiness he found that it was affected by weather by about 1%.
I thought about this, right as streams of water were flooding my face. And eyes. And when I thought about how happy I was in that moment, I gave myself a solid 7.
If you have read my book, you understand why my emotional state is extremely resilient. I'm almost always perfectly happy with whatever is going on. I'm even happy when I'm sad. This is the result of how I see the world, more than anything else.
Most people measure their satisfaction with life in how many external things - both "stuff" and experiences - and then find themselves getting hungrier and hungrier for more external things to stimulate them. Textbook addict behavior.
The movie "Revolver" has really low IMDB rating, and that's mostly because no one understands it. It's a brilliant movie, I think. When Guy Ritchie was asked about this, he said that the whole point of the movie is "there is no external enemy." And that that was it, it's as simple and as complicated as that. Watch it when you get the chance.
Bottom line: Your happiness and satisfaction with life is not a function of anything external. Including physical things, possessions, and things you do, and especially other people. If you think having more friends or meeting "the one" will make you happy, you are digging yourself into a hole.
Your happiness IS a function of how you see the world. And that's about it.
Most people walk around feeling "incomplete." Phrases like "you complete me" sound all romantic, but they're ultimately destructive. If you don't feel complete all on your own, you have a problem. You're setting yourself up for prolonged misery.
So what's the point of wanting anything? Why would you want a perfect partner or an awesome car?
Why not? Life's a great big amusement park, and you can go on whichever ride you want. That doesn't mean one ride is better than any other.
You can skip the line of the most exciting ride in the park, but it seems most people have camped out at the popcorn stand, getting fat, and craving more popcorn.