I've always been a fan of procedurally generated stuff. When I signed up to get my SETT blog up today it came in with the default name of 'The Tiny Octopus'. It really spoke to me so it will remain for now. I can always change it again later and I like improvising stuff. Time for a quintessential 90's web construction link.
Update 4/22/13 - Took responsibility for my older posts from Tynan.com and sucked them into my domain. Will be swallowing my older content from the other 2 blogs I've had as well and maybe even some surprise stuff from before that in the future.
A parlay in craps is akin to 'letting it ride' or for the non gambling among us using your winnings and betting them back on the table. Sure you stand to lose it all on risky bets but life does not seem to link well with those who just play it safe. Life seems to be a continual slide down into what people term 'death' or oblivion or whatever in which only the ones who really make at least a push for the top enjoy a life well lived. What has been a constant personal troll of mine is getting into situations where my fear pushes me into actions which are a guaranteed slight loss instead of a possible medium loss and an incomprehenisble gain. If anyone has read many of my other posts I'm a big advocate of Pascal's Wager - making small bets which if lost are inconsequential in the short run but could pay off huge in the long run. As a craps player I was always kind of an iffy breakeven player until I discovered the power of the parlay. Sure I may lose 50-100$ sometimes 200$ a session but in the long run given my infrequent gambling (none now at this point) that money would not matter anyhow and I've had some big wins to show for it. 10$ --> 400-700$ twice maybe 10-->200 once and a 1-->280$ triple parlay on the any craps on the come out as my best burst. What if I made small bets in the past on every precious metal? On the stock markets? (which have continually grown) What if I applied momentum and parlayed instead of spend and/or sit?
Sooo..... I was taking a halfway conscious nap this afternoon and an odd thought came to my mind. What if instead of getting money/presents/whatever else people get for birthdays/christmas/giftgivings/housewarmings/etc... I ask for precious metals instead? Realistically I'd just request no gifts just modest cash donations for a 'special project' and turn them around into precious metals if the market price is good else deposit them into lending club certificates for the 5-15% interest. I'd then take this money around and reinvest it again! Once the money got big enough similar to pruning a tree I'd take a small bite off for my own personal happiness while knowing in the background I had a financial foundation which brought me peace.
It would be a slight change of pace from the norm. Instead of splurging on whatever I'd want to get with the usual consumerist mindset I'd invest all the money instead. This would require me to continually work on being happy with less which is a path I started on since I was 10 (it somehow hit my consciousness at that age that getting more stuff did not make me happier. In fact it made me sadder as I realized the number of sacrifices people were making to get me things). Anyway I left the boat of consumerism long ago and opted to save my money but in lieu of investing I just saved my money up waiting to make the big jump into starting my own business or whatever. I never got the 'chi' or whatever to make that jump years later unfortunately. With the economy still in shambles though saving fiat currency is a guaranteed loss (history also shows this) so every so often I thought about investing. I asked for advice from many about the markets and got mixed results which I shared in this older thread from John Wes linky. A few weeks ago I decided to disregard all the limiting beliefs regarding the markets people have drilled into me and jump into them myself linky2. I invested a modest 500$ into Tesla Motors on the recommendation of DrOdio linky3 and since then it's been steadily climbing upwards.
no drive in life, no desire or compunction to do what i need to do
lack of conviction in terms of what's the right choice, constantly getting confused by my own mind. every thought i consider will inevitably lead me to considering another thing. decisions won't be made, only nullified
i instinctively mull over things that don't matter at all, that don't help me achieve the goal i'm working towards. i have formed a habit of letting my mind get distracted by anything, just to "figure something out"
i have a lot of unsubstantiated "knowledge" that I gained from books and passed my logic test, so now they always pop up to "help" me validate the "truth" of a statement. Of course I can never act on something without being completely sure that it will work beforehand. Uncertainty gives me a lot of anxiety and makes me want to give up - like every time i try to code something these days, pondering my next step seems like walking into an abyss. It really shouldn't, I feel like I know enough that it shouldn't be the case, but I think I haven't linked up that knowledge properly. I've assembled it into my web of confusion, but it doesn't help solve problems because it's not linear. the knowledge doesn't know when to pop up, when it's actually relevant. it just pops up all the time. anything tangentially related, and i'll consider it. And this is happening for tons of bits of "knowledge" at once. So I have huge amounts of crap running through my head. I guess this is why I had to use a pad and paper to work through this shit and actually get anything done at Bridgestone
i've always been a space case. i've been convinced of things that i've read just because they make sense, just because they link up with my other knowledge. I've made up theories to explain people's behavior that were utterly stupid, and tried to always keep track of all the possibilities, because I have Asperger's and had no idea how other people really think. All these possibilities stuck around in my head and added to the clutter.