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Overanxiety, Worrying, Insanity, and the possible cure for these ills...

Hey hey,

Been a while since I've put down a post - been busy with the holidays and stressed with some events in my past after hitting a euphoric peak around Thanksgiving. That's when the curtain came crashing down seemingly. Looking back I guess with good reason too...

For the longest time I was a worrying type but I've only really been conscious of this recently. If anything even came close to being a possible thing to worry about my mind would obsess over it constantly and draw out every possible scenario and try to draw up actions plans to prevent such scenarios. Unfortunately once you solved that the mind would draw up more crazy scenarios given you more reasons to worry and the cycle would continue... Thus instead of enjoying life your brain would constantly use your mind's idle processing time to worry about things.

I didn't think much of this issue until it hit a new breaking point a month or two ago. I worried about things up to the point in which I could no longer control my mental state. Yes - I went insane - certifiably insane :p. I could not control the thoughts in my head any longer. Unless I was drowning out my mind in trance music or computer games or throwing distractions at it I would always go back to idle worrying and terror. Not a good way to live life if you ask me. I could no longer control the thoughts in my head. My mind had literally taking a mind of it's own and it was filled with worry and terror. I became a recluse for a bit as I no longer wanted to face the world - it was too scary - too much could go wrong - one small unfortunate circumstance could bring down our entire existences as we know them.

Anyway while I was huddled in a corner fearing existence I thought to myself, "wow - I wonder if there's a way to turn my brain OFF." Suddenly I felt jealous for the naive and unthinking - ignorance is indeed bliss - a bliss that will come crashing down any second once 'the whole truth of existence was known' but it was indeed bliss and happiness. At my current point it seemed like there was nothing I could do to ever be happy again once I was no longer naive about the world. All my worrying and drawing out of scenarios let me see the world for as it truly was - and I was terrified!!! If one pondered logically about how little it takes to bring down one's state of happiness you may reach an equivalent state I did.


On Military Dad

Now that I've got a couple posts under my belt, I guess I should probably go ahead and welcome everybody to the site.

If the logo looks familiar, but the page feels different, it's probably because you stopped by while I was blogging over on my Tumblr site. I was there for about two years, but I recently felt like giving it a fresh start, so I moved on over to Sett since you can't get much fresher than that. I would be lying if I said I wasn't excited to be here.

I originally started blogging simply because I love to write.

It's something that I've always dabbled with in my free time, and I would love for it to be a major part of my life once I retire from the service. Like anything else, however, writing takes practice, and a blog felt like the perfect venue. Of course, like most people that start down the path, I quickly became addicted to interacting with the readers from around the world that stopped to visit my humble little corner of the internet. That's one of the major reasons that I decided to move over to this platform instead of an older, more established site. The opportunities to have a conversation seem much greater.

When I was going through the list of things that I should blog about, it quickly became obvious that it had to be the two subjects I'm most passionate about: my family and my job.

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