To preface, I know what I did was utterly stupid. I knew it was stupid before, during, and after the fact. I think I'm going to regret posting this, and I entirely expect any and all replies to exacerbate that fact. Most of all though, this is a story about why I'm falling in love with this game and it's community.
Sorry if this turns out long.
I started playing mid-last year, on and off, never really got hooked. Started again last December and it really sunk it. Got hooked into pvp with one account and quickly decided to start another for highsec/industry shenanagins. I'm learning more and more about the game every day, but I still have so much to learn. I am a newbie in every regard.
Then I learned I loved to haul. LOVE it. People kept telling me it's a waste of time, bad for making money, too risky, etc. But I love the fact that I'm directly providing a service for someone, I love it when I get jobs done quick, and most of all it's entirely relaxing. I love hopping from station to station enjoying the scenery and bullshitting in chat. Better than mining!
I'm 5 days away from being able to fly a freighter but have been having great fun still just in my t1 industrial. After expressing an interest in it, a friend seeded me about 1billion to start out. Told me that as long as I was doing public contracts, I would need a large amount of collateral.
I was putting around last night, just finished a job to deliver some mods about 10 jumps outside Jita. I scanned the public contracts and immediately got excited. One 12mil job and one 15mil job, both just back to Jita! Score! Way more than I typically see for public contracts. I scoop up the 12mil job...100mil collateral. Ok, no problem.
I look at the 15mil job before I hit accept...850mil collateral. Shit.
I sit back, stare at my screen. I was desperate to make my own money. Only 10 jumps back to Jita. Seemed like an easy job, right? It was also late, not a lot of people on. Could I make it? I knew deep down that it would be a BAD decision to take this job. It could very well be a scam, and even if it wasn't, it was still stupid.
For reasons beyond my understanding, I hit accept. I was down almost my entire collateral fund between those two jobs, but I was set to make a nice amount of money for what should amount to only a couple minutes worth of scooting. I look in the cargo, and it's some stack of material worth about 715mil. Ok.
As a precaution, I put my Fedo back in his cage and leave him at the station. Only good decision this entire story.
Anyways, you know what happens. Shortly after I undock and get to the gate...maybe it was the second jump...I get blasted. My pod gets left alone and I run the hell away. Make it to a station, and just sit. Dumb. Dumb dumb dumb. I stare at my contract page for a long time.
I look at my killmail. My ENTIRE cargohold drops for the guy. Clean 715mil worth of stuff for the aggressor. I end up losing a total of 950mil in collateral. Embarrassment washes over me in an awesome wave. I was the idiot newbie loot pinata that I've always heard about. Neat.
Unsure of what to do next, I look up the lone dude who killed me and invited him to chat, he accepted and gave an immediate o7.
Was I scammed by your alt? No, he answers. He scanned my ship down at a previous gate and saw isk signs in his eyes. I was stupid to carry that much in a t1, wasn't I? Yeah, he laughs. He told me to never carry more than 100m or else I throw up radars.
We get to chatting more. He links me a fit for a badger. Throws me some more advice. I find out exactly how easy it is for someone to scan down my ship compared to my slow warp time at gates. Tells me exactly how much EHP he can burn down in each ship he uses before Concord pops him. Teaches me about blockade runners and how they can't be scanned. Wouldn't that throw up red flags to suicide gankers then, I ask? He scratches my head and says I have hope yet. Maybe.
He gives me some perspective on how to recoup or ease my recent and massive loss of isk. I never begged for cargo back once. This kill was a big win for him and probably the highlight of his month. His gains were well earned. I thank him for his time, add him to my contacts with the note "took my suicide gank cherry - hurt a lot", and parted ways.
Anyways, huge mistake on my part, but I made an effort to learn from it, and with some help from a friendly suicide ganker, I did just that. I've been playing MMO's since Lineage1 back in the late 90's, and it's been a long time since I've gotten such a fuzzy feeling about an MMO community.
This didn't put off my interest in space-trucking, but I'm making it my quest to make myself a great deal wiser before I get behind the wheel again. People tell me it's a thankless and unrewarding profession in EVE, but so far it's spawned one of the funniest and most interactive experiences with the game I've had to date. I know that in the end, I can make more isk per hour shooting red brackets for hours, but at least with hauling I know that I'm directly interacting with another person, and that no two-trips are ever the same.
Anyways, that's my story. I'm bummed for my lost isk, but after this, I've never been more galvanized to get back into a spaceship.