I feel as though so much of my own life occurs and changes through a sort of cyber-alchemy: each youtube video, jpeg image and article further molding me into the being I am striving to become. So much of our human experience is media based yet so much of this goes undiscussed between friends and family members.
With this blog Mom, I hope to strengthen the bond between us and really change the way that we interact and know each other. I can think of no greater gift I can give you than the real me as I know myself and hopefully through these posts you'll be able to enter some of the inner workings of my mind. I know I'm a bit of a pain sometimes Mom but maybe I'll be less of a bother when I'm not in the room to make such a terrible racket for you :P
Hopefully you enjoy it. Thank you for always being a great Mom for T and I!
Lots of Love, Dylan
I always felt like my Mom thinks I might forget about her someday. This blog was inspired by her in an effort to show how much I really do care about her and that even though sometimes we don't communicate it properly, we can be sure that we can trust one another to be there when we need each other and to always have each others' best interests in mind.
In my youth, I spent much of my time in crazy and hilarious situations, much because I was reckless and indulgent. As I've aged, relatively less turbulent situations come my way because I'm not making the same choices anymore. Despite this, it is appealing to me that I should have some sort of adventures in my life to reflect on as memories and share as stories. So the question of the day is, "What adventures are to be had from the stability of a mature and sober adult life?"
Since drugs and pre-marital sex are both off the table, as are stealing or most forms of law breaking, the options are relatively few compared to if one had no reservations to "immoral" conduct. Indeed, many of my youthful adventures were based on convention breaking, but life changes and so do we all. There must be good, wholesome adventures, I just know it. One question is where to look?
It seems like social life is a good place to start. Often times spontaneous fun can spawn from being with other people. Going to events with new company, making jokes and talking personally with trusted individuals, physically going places either outside of one's comfort zone or that mix up the daily routine all seem like ways to create adventures and experiences worth sharing.
It also seems like ironically enough, work might be a good source of adventure. Pushing past limits into productivity beyond prior experience could be fun in a new way. Especially if the work is creative in nature, although this should get its own category. Getting a promotion or thriving in our workplace can fill us with pride and give us a sense of accomplishment. It might be a slower incline but the workplace grind could be considered an adventure which we dedicate much of our lives to.
Back to creativity. This is a primary interest of mine, being a writer and musician myself. This seems like the ultimate freedom in my opinion because art entails building reflections of ourselves or of the world we live within, which gives us control over our world's definitions, at least for believers. Creativity is essentially playing dress up with our minds, and the challenge of gradual development with the arts makes us come back to this drug of choice. It is literally a drug of choice. So many options, drastic or minutia for us to fill ourselves with. I want to take my writing from the level of task manager to the level of realist painters. I want to take my musicianship from the level of campfire songs and diddling or random rhyming to the level of master composers. I'm also interested in visual art. I'd like to take my stick figure level talent to a recognizable approximation of the subject level..haha.
A while back, a girl I barely knew told me something interesting 'you seem really interesting, like you've got a lot of secrets' ._. Errrr...ok?
To be honest I don't know if I'd agree. Well yeah there's a LOT said person didn't know about me, but of course, I barely knew/know her. And I'm not just not including her name for privacy reasons I just...don't remember her name ._.
Hmm well lets see, there are I'd say, about two people who know 'everything' about me. In quotation marks cuz there's still I'd presume, things that these two people don't know about me, not things I intentionally hide or avoid but just things that they don't know yet. These two people are my best friend, Bunny~! And my boyfriend (do I just call you Dobbsy on here ._.?)
And these people know a lot about me since I communicate with them frequently, on various different 'levels'. We talk about stupid, trivial matters, topical things and wider philosophical ideas as well as sometimes about ourselves, flaws and good points. I think it's because I communicate with them so frequently that these people know so much about me. Obviously its cuz I'm comfortable with them and I trust them that I feel so free when it comes to talking about more sensitive topics or showing them my weaknesses.
That said, its not like I hide anything in particular about myself. Well...lets see. I act around people a lot but I still wouldn't say I hide anything about me. I just act more happy, more sociable than I would be if I were with people who I were comfortable around. Though, if I were around people that made me feel comfortable, I wouldn't have to ACT happy.