American [no longer] In Korea

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Mis(s)adventures in Daegu

It's easy to take Busan for granted. Relatively nice weather, multiple beaches, nightlife and red light districts. You adapt to it fast. Even a nerd like myself who doesn't speak Korean managed to get a few one night stands in Busan last year just by walking around the bars.

Because I liked Busan so much, I never had any desire to go to Daegu. All I knew about Daegu was that it's a smaller and the weather sucks. This year, I decided that I would get to know our socially conservative neighbor to the north, even if that meant going alone and not knowing anybody. So far, I've spent four nights in Daegu and like a freshly convicted first-timer, I'm ready to give my impressions.

Daegu has a lot going for it that Busan doesn't. The nightlife is located in its one downtown area- Banwoldang. It's not as big as Seomyeon, but when there are hundreds of clubs, bars, and restaurants, does it really have to be? There are a dozen expat bars in Banwoldang, far more than any one nightlife district of Busan, in fact probably more than the entire city of Busan. No, definitely more than all of Busan. Not only that, but the centralized nightlife and dense expat population ensure that the venues are well populated with girls and boys who want to tittyfuck eachother's assholes.

I know quasi-anarchism is all the rage these days and while I can see the appeal of Ron Paul, don't underestimate the benefits that come with a centralized banging system. You do still have the option of two Thursday Partys, but the difference is those two Thursday parties don't comprise 40% of the options you have to meet English speakers in a ten mile radius.

There's a clear separation between the expats and soldiers, with the latter mostly occupying hip-hop clubs before their 1AM curfew. These guys aren't the brightest or whitest of the US Armed Forces, but if you've ever gone to a hip-hop club before, you probably already know what to expect. There is animosity between the teachers and soldiers, and no inter-group socializing. If you're used to encounters with drunk black people interacting with members of the service industry who have trouble understanding them, then you won't see anything unexpected.

Sluttiest Mome of 2012

On The Best of Sett

On my last day in Taiwan, I woke up next to Kate in a vacant apartment, our hairless bodies like two shrimp marinading in a pool of ejaculate. I was already packed up, so I put on my gay little shorts and left for the airport with Brett. On the plane I hit it off with the Taiwanese businesswoman I was sitting next to and she agreed to get dinner with me at six. She was only there for three days so I gave her my number and got a room at Dongdaemun Hostel. I showered the morning cum off, put on the nicest clothes I had with me and waited for six to come.

The date flat-lined and there was nothing I could do to save it, so I called it at six forty. However, since I wasn't expecting to pull this off anyway because she saw my age when I was filling out my arrival card. As a hedge, I had arranged another date at eight with the Korean exchange student I met in Taiwan who had returned to Seoul the day before.

I met Exchange Student at a subway exit and took her out for Uzbek food and Russian beer. Her English was better than either of our Korean or Chinese, so we had a good time eating honeycake, and I brought her back to my room. For safe sex, it was quite violent. I didn't walk her out of the hostel, which she pointed out to me through Kakaotalk a few minutes later, and might be why she never had sex with me again.

I enjoy doing chivalrous things like holding open doors, walking girls to the door, and aiming my piss stream away from their hair, but the reason I didn't do it this time was because as I was leaving for our date, I asked the receptionist if she was free after work, and she was. I asked her if she wanted to get a drink with me, and she did. I couldn't risk having her see us leave together (I didn't see her when we came in). Exchange student left my room five minutes before Receptionist's shift ended. I washed cum off myself for the second time that day.

I met the receptionist at the reception desk and took her out for Uzbek food and Russian beer. Her English was better than either of our Korean or Spanish, so we had a good time eating meat pastries, and I brought her back to her room. My stealthy human trafficking of Exchange Student was all for naught, as Receptionist saw us walking in together on the security camera. She asked, but through a smile, and only after a couple beers. It was just to make sure I didn't have a girlfriend. Later that night I washed cum off myself for the third time.

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