Ambition is my guilty pleasure

Thoughts and experiences that inspire me.


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My Adventures: Outward Bound

These are some of my adventures. I hope to have more every year.

When I was 15 & 16 I went on two Outward Bound trips in the summers. This was my first venture to do something on my own. And the first BIG challenge of my life. For those who don’t know about Outward Bound, let me try to sum it up in two ways. My idealized and imagined definition, and the real definition. My idealized and imagined version was me expertly hiking, scaling rocks, cinematically looking over vistas, making camps in minutes, slashing trees and path finding, finding new things, and maybe even carving a stick into a badass wolf or something! All in an ever reaching quest for wilderness exploration! Ummm. Yea. Thats not what happened. I think I watched too much Dances With Wolves and TV specials about Lewis & Clark. But they made it look so easy! The real definition was slow hiking, plentiful whining, arguing, stopping every five minutes, constant gender strength comparison, with 50 lbs of mostly unnecessary gear all of which was crammed into 15 yr old packs that smelled like eu de sherpa. Also, everything was done by the group and had to get permission from the group, sooo, no way could I pull my “mr.wildman” routine, with out getting punished with dish cleaning or putting up the peter bag (good idea, just a pain with like 16 others).

I like to classify the trip as wilderness expeditioning, but that is my idealist coming out again. It was fun, exciting, and pushed me to my limits for sure, but it was also unnecessarily tedious, drama riddled, and mostly thrust upon teens who didn’t actually want to be there any way. I would have loved it even more if it was a smaller, more enthusiastic group, and if it allowed for individual exploration trips!


Why Isn't My Book Done?


Why isn't my book done?

I started thinking about the idea sometime last year, started organizing my notes and outlines in August 2009, and started writing a little in November or December before shelving it.

I was on fire in Taipei, Taiwan in January. Everything was just right, I wrote 4,000 words on a bad day, and my best day was 17,000 words. Book was complete in rough shortly afterwards.

I was in Northern Thailand in February, in Chiang Mai. I was going to edit, but I didn't really. I was kind of flat. I played a lot of Conquer Club online, surfed around, didn't really get anything done. Then I was traveling around and I wasn't really working on the book.

In fact, I never sent anyone a copy until maybe three weeks ago, when I gave it to one of my friends who was asking. He's a great guy, amazing guy, but I was even gunshy about sending it to him. Lord knows why. If you do creative works, maybe you understand this. If you haven't done anything creative and this doesn't make sense to you, I can't explain it. I think creative people will understand a little.

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